orgami's Diaryland Diary

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upon awakening

sipping the coffee
and leaning in the metal chairs
plastic chairs
there is hot sunshine
coating me

I feel sick from exertion
lack of sleep
and all the noise

And that Leanne may have
written me
I rush to the library looking
for these letters and when
there isnt one

she is busy
she has a family
and work to support her
family

who am I but a frivolous
interest I tell myself

I sip more coffee still not
fully awake
watching the traffic
watching the people

I have no trophy wife no
beautiful freinds to sit
and discuss events that
sound so interesting

I just sit here amongst
people that have lives
today I wished i had
brought my sketchbook
even my camera in black
and white mode settings

I should have showered
but I was so tired
I smell like the animal
that I think like

no wonder they roll in
the urine of what they hunt
what they seek
dust baths
and tearing prey alive

maybe im more happier
like this alone

time to think
time to sit leave when
I want too

what do I want
I am peculiarily
odd at times

I have to go out
on the bike and buy
222 painkillers
from the mall
they come in fifty
now before you could
get one hundreds
but people are hooked
even to these mild things

they are robbing and stealing
the heavier drugs from the
pharmacies a lot of them
no longer carry them
they are just too valuable
like gold or more
gold cant get you high on
its own

miners bust their ass to
buy drugs thats their gold
not the metal

fifties it is
a trip out

Ill just mask my animal smell
with Axe body spray
and yet when I had my women
close I loved their smells
the tired days wear
like I like the smell of the lake
the sea the forest on chill rainy
days walking the trail my
senses alive

must go

9:26 a.m. - 2010-08-29

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