orgami's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- may fourteenth twenty fourteen
romantic love....hmmmmmmmm..eight years on and off....thick and thin......most of my relationships last three years to the max....thank god for television and internet to at least come here and leave notes so when it picks up or whatever i decide to do with all this...i can say..here i at least noted this..more a log then a blog.... no one is perfect..true....and sometimes it gets dark and bleak......i stopped using poison of choice....six months going on seven...so i awake from all this..dealing with how i caused issues...and....seeing how others who dont have poison issues are nuttier then i am for different reasons that i would not want to trade them with....not for a day.....lived around enough people..sat with them to understand everyone gets something... not cheap...not frugal..just practical..hoarding every last cent like some....saw that happen for others with others..i dump cash..effort..extras to the women....if this makes you happy here you go...so i live through them..watching the short run of it....relief sometimes for them... why? i had a great beginnings...i have heard those with more income then ours..and had worse..way way worse..and others who had no options..no choices until they grew out of the income or use at home and got to "escape" on the road or marriages of convienence for them and love for the rescuer.... i found that hitting the road with a lot of women was a trip and a half....i liked women because they have more flexible thinking then men...men pack up and split on their own way fast also...i think that everyone dreams of having someone..that special one...or at least a hoarde or pack or harem of their own that works together....coming together for the special moments of relief from the demands or boredom of life.. "eight rolls of toilet paper okay but get the thick stuff not the thin stuff, and if you can get a can of cambells chicken noodle soup" dialogue as it happens...my baby sitting on the other end of the couch...i love her..her name is tatooed on my left hand... sometimes people understand you in a way that they dont understand...and that goes further then those that understand you and cant deal with the same focus of parameters......i liken it in my mind to sitting on a defense...a position...in a bunker....just a hole..sandbags or an open pit....simplicity....i was raised with vietnam on the television....we lived on a lake near the forest..the jungle....swamps pockets beaver meadows..at night as a kid the footage was similar...we were going my brother and i....he said he wouldnt shoot anyone to make my mother happy but not me....i wouldnt run i said..i would get drafted to the belief in the country.flag..principle...drove her up the wall....she cried every night..she was a helper nurse..they did the grunt work like the television grunts...she loved the doctors and went to all the parties with the other nurses and supervisors...my dad was just dug in to the railroad loving his job....the high powers would pull up in the big chryslers..black of course in the dirt driveway.. order systems with men are run like military...order..rank..work.. running with no rules needs a very sharp brain...total independence....i couldnt to it..i just had a great awarenes and intuition... i love women..i like their softness..the mystery of them....their wit mostly and humor....how they bear up beyond men...wider peramiters...sp.. so i come here and write it down.... okay i gotta go to the mall....i enjoy life..i have a nice place housing ...i survived the battles..maybe lost the war but so what....worse..i didnt go through it.... must go no toilet paper left... simplicity of the everyday..im sure theres a poem in here about this kind of thing other then the ethereal i favour.... fare thee well for now fair and great audience.... 11:25 a.m. - 2014-05-14 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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