orgami's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- -
summer over....between all of it..i didnt get to the beach once.....went but it was more posturing...we were all so odd...threw the frisbee and little kite...her crew...but we are miles apart...lost to our ghosts....and she makes no connections....just a tease to keep one interested....sad....all the brightness...and just a holding pattern..not even....im used to those whom are the real mcoy.....like the little local party.....signed up and forgot..so i walked my cheese slices over....gave them to a gathering..no one said much...a few words but no eye contact......im wild looking..vietnam style jacket with my empty blank sewn on name tag...chains and keys...the drawn face....no sleep....a few words and home...people unsure.....not like it was at one time...people thinking they can hold on to something and of course.they dont know what they have...so they havent tested it.....sad.....you knew your crew..you didnt just tease them...looks last so brief....but then i havent chosen them......pretti baubles...looks are okay but can you move..groove and fit.....are you just only about play...thats such a short lived thing....like a toy that is nothing..not like a function thing... im okay with it all....who wants to live here........and yet its a great freedom with nothing.....stars..streetlights and sadness in the stillness..the rains..the cold falls..the winter..arriving in the damp mornings....the traffic thick...always the busiest days....isnt it always like that..... all of you.....you loved me...the eyes....you all knew..i didnt really love you...how could i....away away away like they spoke...... listening to haunted music....mileys version of summertime sadness..katy perry the one that got away and lana del rey...flipside...wow....and vietnam shit...because we were brainwashed we were going as kids....was saw the kids in the newscasts.....we lived in the areas that looked just like where the battles were on...... now im fifty....looking like someone from the nam in my jacket wit the black name plate empty..a ghosts..vietnman huanted me now i haunt it... and of the others....well love is old news anyway.....its a crazy trip......ha..ok just looking back..long weekend..things ok here... im fine.......................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... 11:44 p.m. - 2014-08-31 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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