orgami's Diaryland Diary

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blah blah blah about this and that

just came back from going on this rant
to Lori about money and what we owe
Like its two hundred and fifty dollars
and I freak Then I told her about my
earlier lectures about money from my parents and then told her I never did
get around to paying them some money
so I feel like shit for it and then I came
here and met some people from the meeting
who are looking forward to seeing me at
the AA meeting tonight
probably made Loris day shitty for her
and Why?? because of stupid money
Like its the end of the world
we can afford it Its just that it would
have been nice to have that money to
put in other things other then right back out there in Bills

and I just got back in from a few days at a freinds and everytime I go there I help him out but it only seems like I am the one who visits his cottage and works
everyone else visits for weeks or days and they dont have to do anything and I get there and I am cutting the grass helping him with the garbage and putting up clothelines cutting up tree branchs from the lawns for the firepit down at the lake etc...and I dont have money to even visit the guy and he doesnt offer any money it just seems I am doing more and more when I am there
maybe I just need a break from him
I feel good about helping him but I cannot help it when I go there and another mutual freind has been at the cottage for a week and they have generated all this garbage that My freind who owns the cottage has to take away I dont think Lori and I would be able to have the cottage for free for a week like that without us being made or asked or expected to work

usually we end up going to Huntsville which is an enjoyable trip for me but this time we didnt go anywhere just work work work

it used to be fun but now its getting to be a drag especially when he bitchs about the other freinds and then says nothing to them to their face

Lori says he should be capable of getting up in the morning and cutting his grass but he waits until i get there to do all this stuff
Lori is right he actually did wait for me to come by on my own money to do this work The only good thing was this other freind John bitched at him about not eating organic food or getting a job
(my freind who owns the cottage and house has a ninety thousand dollar inheritance..)

maybe its just ordinary stuff that goes on between freinds or maybe I'm just tired of getting there and finding him
with so much "work" needed around the place

whatever its not worth the time running the thing over and over in my head
I'll just stay away from them until
they figure out or maybe not figure out why I dont bother to visit anymore
Let John and my freind cut the lawns
take out the trash etc.....

My freind did call to say he is enjoying
his place and thanks for the good work
but deep down its not right
this I know

its time I visited someone else
for a change anyway...
(but there isnt anyone else...)

i cant believe I filled this whole half hour with money and that stupid small
problem...

12:01 p.m. - 2005-08-20

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