orgami's Diaryland Diary

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serration

world is slowly dissolving

floods famine crime

watch this documentary channel

now and its got to be the most

interesting but damned depressing

stuff going

at least U tube i can watch

music from a time forgotten

like the eighties when the

world was brighter greener

more youthful somehow

hah hah

i am already spending hours

tweezing out the white hairs

from my moustache and goatee

and am still fourty pounds

overweight

Actually finished that Loon

painting this evening

its kind of groovy in places

from my tiredness

gotta admit no two paintings

are ever the same

but it looks okay

work was insane

a huge box of cast mould things

to do

and more tommorrow to go

the boss is cool though

i keep thinking of people

who spend their careers hoping

to get a promotion or raise

or anything really and nothing

ever happens for them

happened for me lots of times

and cant say i took it all that

well either

lots of blackness

lots of booze

politicking

im just glad i have what i

have today

i am very lucky for a lot

or reasons

had to walk away from a lot

of systems that turned me down

though

read lots of books for awhile

i feel the same about watching

these documentaries

like surfing books from the library

awhile ago

three at a time rolling through

pages grabbing a chapter here and

there

recently my daughter has shown

a great interest in Graphic Design

i dont think she is saddled with

sever depression and alcoholic

tendencies i had back then

popping my pills to try to rid

myself of that useless feeling

she acutally works and has a

stable relationship

everyone around me seem to have

gotten their niche

i sleep not so well

i am on the damned web too much

coffee with my freinds

they are okay people

human

but extreme or lively or

radical would describe them

and i havent done coffee with

anyone other then Lori in months

I just go to Demarcos and sit

and stare at the old fashioned

walls and treats and listen to

the television and gabbing or the

regulars

Actually stopped into this creative

store run by women

i have been thinking of printing up

some of my poems

only because i really admire poets

and songwriters

not because i think i am this great

poet

i dont think i am that great at all

i have lots of faults still

however live each day as a new one

which amounts to repetition and

cycle

stay up to late writing D land

listening to music

Jimmy Hendrix

Cowboy Junkies

Joy Division

Rammstein

Sleeping alone is nice though

and being with a non complete crazy

person is something that eases

the old nerves

i still write the crazy person

when i am craZy

its like the connection

like a cylclonic thing

spinning away the extra

density

making it more radioactive

i play my airplane game

i fly Lancaster bombers

or b26's but i prefer

the Lancs

simple graphics

hard hard game

still cannot land

or fly worth a damn

Im writing on Loris side

of the computer because

of some music thing

she is doing

all her chums keep coming

on from Messenger

Lori is popular

i am not so much

wow there goes the rain

on the roof

i shut the air off

for now

cant stand that thing

roaring away

thunder now too

thats nice

i need a bike lock

and a bike rack

and a headlight

maybe a mirror

new hand grips

and a fender

oh and a pink soccer

ball for someone

i feel wiped

too wired full of thoughts

to sleep

damn im happy that i finished

that persons painting

Docs appointment went well

im off to get a physical also

soon Gotta do bloodwork too

somewhere sometime

somehow

my back is basically pretty

messed up but i still

continue to be the madman

and mow that vertical hill out

back and carry heavy shit in

my backpack

and work with heavy stuff all

day

however read this great magazine

article about disabled people who

take these nature trips out on

trails in deserts etc etc

totally inspirational

makes me and my stupid spasming

back seem trivial

I am so grateful for my daughters

health and Loris kids health too

five people i know have serious

cancer issues

god am i just rambling tonight????

please let me stop here

this is not what i intended

i have to get some sleep

listen to the rain

try and have pleasant dreams

give the ghosts a night off

..O..

11:47 p.m. - 2007-06-18

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