orgami's Diaryland Diary

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coffee coffee coffee

ho im back
why
because Diaryland is where i first
started

and Facebook is okay
its so weird a concept
to know that so many can
just look at the blogs
the entries
like writing a typewriter
full of poems and a thousand
eyes pass through checking
it out Okay maybe fifty
but still lot more then
three freinds and all

I cant play cards
im so disabled with math
it takes me time to figure
math out but i persist
but card games go so fast

im so ashamed i just dont play
and i cant shuffle even though
i have tried for years and years

never learned how to Play Dungeons
and Dragons and the Play Station
one games I would miss clues
and stuff not really a digital
brain mine is full of tube amps
and wound springs

the cat lounges upside down
his paws tucked
hes so cool

Not on anti depressants because
between five doctors ive had so
far in North Bay
(they all retire or get sent back
to the Psych for some reason to
administer there..)

they said the anti depressants
made me anxious

but I am on anti psychotics
mood stabilizes and anti seizure
and a sleep tablet

big time on the mood stabilizers
three big pink pills

without them i stay up for days on
end last time was four days straight
and then a big crash feeling so low
like crying and all

if i can just discipline myself
with getting to bed early now

that is the latest challenge
im so wound up at the end of
the day

writing helps
Lori pointed out I have few freinds
well I do have a few
but they are pretty wild themselves
adventurers etc
always a tale to tell

Im just writing here a lot today
because i havent been here for awhile
and I am alright

summers coming
we are surviving

and I am glad I am alive

and the coffee is helping
More caffeinne More!!!!!!

3:45 p.m. - 2008-04-29

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