orgami's Diaryland Diary

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

still on a run

never sure what Im pushing
against or towards
or away

something out here in LahLahLand
I want
death? certianly not a redemption
not out here in no-man's land
but I'm not certian about anything
anymore I've not become blind
with that knowledge and experience

a cold rattles my chest
and I wish I had a hot water bottle
and a woodstove whistling with
sizzling hardwood and air rushing,
the flicker show of the shadows
running on the wall like soft
visions SHADOWPLAY
out of booze for the moment

away from the two day alcoholic
binge...not even needing more
then a mickey anymore..damaged
enough through the years
all the wreckage of it
but feeling myself fading fast
rushing to the edge
maybe this time I will be swept
off......

9:44 p.m. - 2012-01-14

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

previous - next