orgami's Diaryland Diary

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First decent day of spring in My City!

I am a square peg in the round holes..

I am different even to most standards
People love me or hate me...
and I dont chum up en masse like a lot
do....I prefer what I knew then...
the just being left alone..
Left out..Not included
.Rejection..ahh..a cop out term
in this day and age.

I always knew it was a bigger push
from the others whom stole friends
whom never were in the first place
I just hoped something would work
more....in the end I made friends
lately...fifty years in the making..
and along the way..

and not your garden variety either..

People who think they should be
popular and are not...really hate
people that do have a tendency to
draw attention...
People that consider themselves the
all because of cars...clothes...
a trophy man or woman at their side
that they pay heavy for in drugs..
cars..do all....Without that input
they would be gone..the trophy ones..
When such talk to me...spend time to
me it really irks many...

But I know all this..
I met people who dealt with the top
to bottom and they said I have "It"
a something..Im not claiming a greatness
for its not looks...nor money..nor
anything...a something..
like a key that sometimes I get included
in schemes and scenes that others drool
over..dream about..work so hard..and
are denied..There.not rejected..considered
but denied....There is a difference
between rejection and that!

anyway...todays story instead of poem
is about that..
in the end they can have it all..
and always have something to say about
me or put me down in words..looks
etc...I just draw that out of them
with my eyes.....And I can pretty much
with the intuition I have and the strange
intellect piece things together..

Metaphor is when the mini putt courze
(Man or woman) turns away from you
even if you want them...When really
You can walk on to the Golf Course
and play a round and they cannot...

But then there is joy in being tortured
sometimes..and torturing them...
not in a sense of brutality although
that too....but in the only way to truly
know how to feel in that area..
when there are many many many more..

Got some brain ideas run past me today..
people pointing.....testing my reactions
and of course reacted...playing the shit
show I call it...you have to do it..
otherwise hole up forever in a room..
cabin and let life slip past..
everyone dies off or moves on and you
end up becoming the very person left to
fear...Oh thats a good quote..
Im smart....

in some ways....some ways that the even
smarter people that I would want..

pretty deep brainy far out there stuff
today...but thats good..
because Im dealing with very brilliant
people
and they dont have time to wander about
in lah lah land for years and years and
years like I've been doing...

is there a value...oh yes....
I meet many who are there not from choice
let me tell you and they either are or
arent...

movement is everything

9:38 p.m. - 2015-03-10

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